School

As I write this, I am already counting the days until I go back to school. It's always this way after a break. I want to see my students, but I dread the stress it brings. I am trying to figure out a way to handle this a little better in the coming year.

As we head back, I know that there will be big changes coming, in my program. I started this site based program at our school. In case you don't know, I have a site based program for children who have Autism. It has been tough. I was asked to apply to be a para and I walked out of the interview, the teacher. I had two weeks to pass the Colorado PLACE exam and start the Teacher in Residency program. I passed and started school. I have had classes most Saturdays for two years. I made it and passed with As. The program has doubled in size. The children have made progress. I can't even get my head around all that I have learned. I can write an IEP with the best of them. I passed my certification exam last month and now I am getting ready for my last semester of school. It has been such a roller coaster ride. I am really tired, but it is the kind of tired that comes after you have worked really hard.

All of these good things have happened because I have trusted God with each and every step that I have taken. If I hadn't, there would have been absolutely no way I could have done it. I am now getting ready for another chapter to begin. I have been told, through rumors, that my program is going to be dissolved. I feel like I have built the barn to watch it burn. On the other hand, the school where I work is way out east and my commute is long. The district is not known to be the best and they tend to do things like dissolve programs when they are up and running. I don't really want to continue to work for this district, anyway. The problem is that I don't know how to let go of my kiddos and the paraprofessionals that work for me. The dissolving of the program is a very strong rumor. It might not be announced for sure until June. That way, the district won't have to deal with parents as much. That will be too late to look for another job in another district. I don't want my kids and families to think I have given up on them, yet I can't tell them what is happening with the district. It is so stressful. I am trying to take it one day at a time. I am getting my resume ready to apply for positions in two other school districts that are much closer to where I live.

This journey is the most rewarding and the most stressful time in my life. Please keep the prayers coming as there are days that that is what keeps me going.